One of the oft-made complaints about 'family' is that you cannot choose it. It's an accident of birth. Whereas you can choose your friends and, so the theory goes, that is more likely to work out well. But who do you go back to. When the wheels fall off? Who offers undying love and unquestioning support, almost whatever you have done? Your friends or your family? Bear that in mind when you read the following:
I hear a lot on twitter about the 'Gooner Family'. I like the idea. It sums up very well how I feel about the relationship. Of course some people use it as an 'arm-twisting' device for a follow-back, and that's just fine by me. Being a member of the Gooner Family is a good start in my book, but it doesn't make you a different person. You might still be a moron. Sorry about that, but we have to face facts. It is perhaps less likely than if, say, you were a Spud, but I also know some excellent people who happen to support a different team, yes even Spurs.
I'm an Arsenal fan. I love the club, the team, the ethos, everything about it. It's bigger than me. And you. it's been here long before both of us. It will be here long after we're gone. I'm not a passing fan, something to do along the way. I don't go to the games at the moment because I can't for reasons of finance and distance. But that does not mean that I'm a lesser fan. My first Arsenal hero was Charlie George. It's been a life-long relationship for me.
For me, the team is like my kids. I see every one of them as one of my children: Some are great and I'm so proud of them. Some don't quite make it, but I still love them (like my kids). I wish they were better. I wish they were all heroes. That they all scored the winner in the cup final. Sometimes it just doesn't work out for the individual players. That doesn't mean they weren't trying their best. I don't think that anyone who ever played for The Arsenal has not tried to do their best. Although I have to admit that the (relatively recent) influx of big money into the game has made the mercenary scenario much more likely.
However, I happen to take the view that, even if you are paid astronomical amounts of money to play for one club or another, you may well have gone to the highest bidder irrespective of your personal loyalties (it's a world game now after all); when you walk out onto the pitch you will give everything you have for the team, the fans and, especially, your team-mates. Yes, maybe as a 'professional' rather than a 'fan' but the result is the same in my view.
I don't think we can expect footballers to behave differently from the rest of us on that score: It's true that some people (quite a few in my experience) will go to work, do just enough to get by, and take the pay-check. But these people are not the 'rain-makers', not the high-achievers, they are the 'also rans' and I don't think one can become a seriously good professional premier league player these days if that's your attitude.
Sometimes your own kids just aren't quite good enough, however hard you and they tried. You have to remember that other parents' kids are on the opposing team. And they're trying just as hard, for the same reasons. And sometimes they win. If that wasn't the case, it wouldn't be much of a challenge. And, therefore, not worth the levels of effort, sacrifice and determination that they - and we - put in every week and year. And winning, in the end, against all the odds, over the other family's 'kids' wouldn't be nearly as sweet.
Of course we all want to win. We'd give anything for Arsenal to do well. It hurts like hell when they don't. Today's society wants it all. Now. One can sometimes see this in the views of some of our younger fans - the 'Game-Over so start again and have another go until you win' mentality. But life's not like that. Even if you have virtually unlimited funds available, like Citeh or Chel$ki, it's not easy. What's that cliché? There's no 'I' in 'team'? But there is 'Mate'. I like that concept, trite though it may be.
So if 'our kids' (your kids) don't win all the time, you need, instead of criticising them, to help and bolster them. To reassure them and to help them to win next time. Criticising them, calling them 'crap' and worse, doesn't help. These are our kids, our family. You might well be disappointed and angry. But remember who they are: 'Our kids'. Our family. Calling them names is more about you and your failings than it is about them.
They're doing their best. Sometimes I think that you should ask yourself if you are doing the same? I hear a lot about 'Gooner Family' but sometimes I'm not sure if some people understand what 'family' really means. I'm sorry if this view offends you. Actually I'm not really. If, after reading, you're still of the view that some players are crap, and shouldn't wear the shirt. well I'd invite you, very politely, to fuck off.
You might well be a 'fan', I'll grant you that. But you're not 'Family'.
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